May 2012 Challenge: Education Evolves. Teen Talks

photo: zmescience.com

The number one constant in date rape... A-L-C-O-H-O-L! True! There is never an invitation nor an excuse to rape. Still don't heighten the chance. 

AEF offers education that evolves as our children grow. Teach teenagers about the dangers of under-age alcohol consumption. 

Alcohol consumption can cause confusion, impaired senses, unconsciousness and coma.

Set the Scene: An underage, drunk teenage girl at an unsupervised party. Not wishing to engage in sexual activity, is passed around a room full of boys with raging hormones. She never says no and can't quite distinguish just how many of her male peers are involved. A few weeks later she is ill. Sick at the sight of things and nauseaus at their smell. Her mother suspects the worse and it is. At 14, her daughter is pregnant. Who's to blame? A teenage girl for attending the party? The teenage boy for taking advangtage of the situation? Or the parents for not warning all minors of the dangers of alcohol consumption? 

As always, each challenge, is one I not only vow to take, but solemly do so each and every month. My daughters have yet to reach teenage-dom. But my son is of the perfect age for this talk! Work and driving will soon be two priveldges he is to partake in. With these new milestones come different freedoms.... Time this education evolves. Time for another teen talk!! 

Remember---

1 in 4 girls/1 in 6 boys will be the victim of sexual assault before their 18th birthday. 

Child sexual abuse is a senseless crime. One that is avoidable. Yes it is real, but it is not incurable. The solution resides with each of us. Spread the word. Take the challenge. Become aware. Let others know of your knowledge. Happy May

April Challenge: Simpy Repost, Retweet, Repeat

"Never judge what you don't understand." ~Zane

Hard to explain to someone who has no clue. It's a daily struggle being in pain or feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status for at least 1 hour if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (PTSD, Anxiety, Bipolar, Depression, Diabetes, CROHNS, LUPUS, Fibromyalgia, MS, ME, NF, Arthritis, Cancer, Heart Disease, Epilepsy, Autism,M.D., Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis, Sickle Cell Disease, etc...)

Adding to this list of invisible diseases, child sexual abuse. 

Usually unsuspected, the perpetrator goes unpunished and the victim is left with a lifetime of pain. Invisible scars, not the physical ones that fade, but the mental and emotional ones. Statistics state that 1 in 4 females will be sexually abused before her 18th birthday. I keep counting the 'her's and 'she's that reside within my circle. 100's of us. I know i'm not the only one, Angel Eyes: A Collective Memoir of Child Sexual Abuse is testimony to that. But how much longer must my 'sister's remain hidden, Invisible. My heart breaks not for the pain we've endured, but because some are still too afraid, too ashamed to speak out! How can the cycle stop.................................?

#RepostRetweetRepeatAEF

s/n It's never too late to become a Sponsor/Supporter of The Angel Eyes Foundation

November Challenge: Something To Be Thankful About

In the case of child sexual abuse, children are more likely to disclose the information to a person other than a parent! Why is this? Various reasons may provoke this course of action, but the one that may be most prominent is Fear of Rejection. Children are afraid they will be shunned, pushed away, not believed, ignored... they fear the rejection of a loved one. This makes the pain seem like an even heavier burden. But if your child has been allowed to establish an open line of communication with parents and caregivers, and healthy relationships have been encouraged with outside forces, much of the hurt that comes in the form of long term effects may be derailed. Or better yet, the abuse may be halted altogether. Those that sexually abuse children go through a phase with potential victims called the 'grooming' phase. They tend to target children who are more withdrawn. Replace that element with something to be thankful about. Enforce and Encourage a support system that entails not only adults, but peers your child(ren) trust. Know that these bonds are definitive to the social lives of our youth. If any hurt, harm or danger should come their way, this peer force will be the first to know. Learn who your child's bestfriend is, take an interest in their friendship, and water the seed of trust between the two. In it's growth, you can be reassured, that any pertinent information such as child sexual abuse will be disclosed. This disclosure with a trusted ally will hopefully strengthen voices and give victims the courage to speak out.

Katandra Shanel Jackson
Founder of Angel Eyes Foundation

October Challenge: Take 10/Stop. Look. and Listen

Question: When's the last time you put the old fireman's adage to use? Stop. Look. and Listen! This month's challenge is to put it to the ultimate test. 24 hours=1,440 minutes. Spend 10 UNINTERRUPTED minutes of your day Listening to your child. The challenge becomes tricky if you have a multi-kid household, but even then the math is simple. 10 x The # of children in your home. If you must divide the time with another adult or older sibling, then by all means... please do so. All too often we get lost in the hustle and bustle of everyday life that we forget to just stop, look, and listen to those dearest to us. If we as adults are swept away in the busyness, what of our children?? Take 10 minutes out of your hectic day. My guess is you'll be surprised at how much they have to say & how much you don't know. The sessions may go a little slowly at first. Don't be discouraged. Not only is this a 'talking' challenge, it's also an 'observation' challenge. As parents sharpen their listening skills, unspoken observations will become more clear. Children know when someone genuinely cares and eventually they will verbally open up.

*Because this challenge may be difficult to achieve on a daily basis, set 3 days aside each week. Mark it on your calender. Child(ren) and Parent/Caregiver alike will begin to look forward to that sacred time. So Take 10 to Stop. Look. and Listen.

AEF President & Founder-- Katandra Shanel Jackson Taylor

September 2011 Challenge

Attention: Mothers, Aunts, Sisters, Grandmothers, Female Family Members/Friends. Now is the time, a conversation is in order. The good thing about this is that there is no age requirement. Children are never too young to learn Correct Terminology. But first before you trade 'boobs' for breast and 'pee pee' for vagina/penis... ask them what do they already know. My guess is you'll be surprised. In the case of single fathers, seek the voice of a female family member or friend that your child(ren) is/are comfortable around.

The purpose in this month long challenge is to open up the more serious channel of conversation with our children. Often times 'cutesy' names for our private parts/genitalia induce snickers to downright uproarous laughter. By expanding their vocabulary with these very powerful words, we empower their voices. As the month unfolds and conversations take place, please feel free to comment via this note. Share your experience, your fear, your relief, your trepidation, your own experience with this topic as a child, any tips that may be beneficial in preparing for this 'talk'. Thank you.

--AEF President, Katandra Shanel Jackson {Taylor}