January 2012 Challenge: Prepare the Battlefield

The low self-esteem seen in girls does not disappear with maturity; girls with low self-esteem often grow to be women with low self-esteem. Low levels of self-esteem are linked to increased rates of depression, substance abuse, suicide and eating disorders in both adolescents and adults (How Schools Shortchange Girls, 1992; Melpomene Institute, 1996).
       
Children who are confident of their own voices and assured of their right to say no are more readily able to fend off sexual abuse. As a parent, i'm aware that we yearn for compliant children. But a child that is afraid to question authority, could possibly be a child that becomes the target of a predator. When we encourage self-esteem in our children we boost the awareness of their own personal strength. What perpetrator would wisely target a child that is confident, sure, and unafraid to say 'no'? This very child is more likely to disclose any abuse. A healthy and positive self esteem may very well be your child's most important weapon against child sexual abuse.
 
A few signs of low self esteem:
Withdrawn, Fear of interaction
Not many, if any friends
Sad, depressed
Negative self-image
Loner syndrome, anti-social

What can we as Parents & Guardians do to Prepare the Battlefield?
Replace negative thoughts with positive ones
Celebrate achievements
Teach realistic goal setting
Trust your own feelings
Be mindful of your own words. Don't put them down, build them up!
Acknowledge and reward effort
Be a positive role model, one your child admires and trusts
Redirect negative beliefs and give positive feedback, especially after an upset
Provide a safe, loving, and nurturing environment
Allow decision making opportunities
Encourage your child to speak his or her mind
 
*On a personal note. Self-esteem for girls is not just about how we look, it's about how we feel about how we look as well. Do not allow the mirror or peer pressure or the media to become your daughter's nemesis, instead become her bestfriend and tell her daily how beautiful she is and that beauty radiates from within*
 
K. Taylor, Author of Angel Eyes: A Collective Memoir of Child Sexual Abuse (publish date, April 2012)
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